7 steps to enjoy eating out or joining friends for dinner

Secretly (or maybe not so secretly) so many of us make resolutions to eat better, exercise more, play more, get outside more, spend more time with your family members… Personally, I admire everyone who makes even the simplest change towards their goals. You shouldn’t be put down because one of your goals is to create health by facing some areas you’d like to address.

Getting on the “higher moral ground” doesn’t work; espousing the merits of clean eating with friends of family members who have zero interest (despite your desire to help and love them). Do what works you in front of them and don’t ever bat an eye.

In this article, I want to break down key mindset, strategies, and tips I have learned to stick with my personal integrity on what I choose to put in my body. After all, my body, my choice.

    1. Invited to a restaurant? Suggest a venue you’d like to try by scoping out menus before-hand.

• Most of the time groups of family or friends aren’t decisive about where they want to go. Be decisive in a friendly way. “I’ve always wanted to try ____” works really well.
• To do this, I scope out the menus of different restaurant options you think everyone would like, and to see what places have dishes that are suitable for me. For example, I love “World Cuisine” and in Anchorage we have many options including (in order of $$) Ginger, Haute Quarter Grill, Bradley House, Southside Bistro, Club Paris. There are others of course and Simon and Seaforts is an all-time favorite, all of these are extremely amenable to “may I have extra veggies instead of rice?” or “can you serve the sauce on the side?”, not all places will do that
• Sides are key. Since a healthy protein portion like chicken or fish is great most of the time it comes down to the spice, sauce, and sides that come with the dish. I always check out the sides on each menu option to see if they would be healthy for me. That’s where speaking with the wait staff becomes important. If I ask: is there one that doesn’t have sugar (or dairy), great staff will suggest an option and even consult with their chefs if they don’t know the answer. Note: you’ve not imposed anything on the others at your table; you’re just looking over ingredients in two quick questions.

       2. Don’t Stress About Perfection

• When I first started sticking to (in my case a Lyme diet—which, by the way, 10 years remission now) I initially worried about every single bite of food I put into my body. Over time, I have learned that Lyme disease is not just about diet. There are many different factors that come into play.
• Yet, certain health care providers glom onto slapping your hands for the smallest transgression. This is unhelpful in most circumstances (sometimes, like with my Lyme, it became invaluable for a short period of time. Now, even if I get into something that used to create a flare-up; I’m rebalanced and that small transgression doesn’t matter). Be patient. The beginning of your journey may need to be aggressive or not depending on your health situation, and goals. Usually, it lightens up with time.
• We are all unique and individual. Think of the 80/20 rule. 10-20 percent of the things you eat will cause 80-90 percent of your symptoms. Work with your nutritionist to figure out which foods you have to avoid completely (there will be some) and don’t be insanely particular about the rest. Red flag foods are sugar, cereal grains (grass family grains are wheat, corn, rice, oats, rye, barley which make up nearly 70 percent of what we consume in the U.S. due to marketing), and dairy. Once you take away your most problematic foods as the main source of unwanted symptoms you will have more energy, fewer joint paints, fewer digestive issues, and MORE FUN.
• Do use the made-over recipes at www.OurNutritionKitchen.com as a place to start.

      3. Keep It Simple

• Again, stay away from the foods that you cannot tolerate and keep it simple after that. Please note: Nearly 70 percent of our foods being marketed to us are difficult to digest and inflammatory, billions spent on marketing and subsidies stripped funding for growing real food.
• Cane, corn, and agave are heavily marketed and aretoxic to the nervous system.
• Just because an item is wheatless doesn’t make it “gluten free”. Corn, Oats, Rice, Rye, Barley, and Millet are all from the grass family plants and all have something so similar to gluten that your body doesn’t know the difference.
• This might not sound simple because, well What’s there to eat once we’ve been “trained” by marketing subsidized foods? That’s why I developed www.ournutritionkitchen.com over the last 13 years. So many recipe makeovers and none include cane/corn/agave neurotoxic sugars or grass family plants that inflame our digestive tracts.

      4. Offer to Cook

• Want a group get-together? Find a tasty recipe and offer to make dinner. This way you can select grass-fed meat (Options if you can plan in advance: Anchorage has few places that sell 100 percent grass fed meat. Buy locally at and any other ingredients that go with your dish. You will be able to select each ingredient for the meal this way and customize it to your liking. You can ask friends to chip in for costs and help out with the cooking.
• A potluck? Bring something you will enjoy eating so, again, you can select your ingredients.
• Such a fun and easy way to share a meal with friends and also work on your cooking skills. Your friends will probably think it is super cool that you can create a tasty dish that is also super healthy (super fun, here’s what I brought, no need to lecture!).

      5. Find quick and easy places to stop for lunch or take-out

• Once again, in Anchorage we have resources; do ask them about added sugers and choose accordingly—gluten is a buzzword these days; there is a bigger picture:
  • My favorite is Out of the Box in the Spenard area. Most items are under $10 and the menu changes when they can make halibut tacos and more.
  • Lahn Pad Thai on Abbott road. Call ahead for takeout, this is honestly one of the best Thai restaurants in town. Staff are willing to guide you towards no sugar and no grain options by adding extra veggies instead of filling up with rice.
  • Pho Lena also has gluten free options and multiple locations depending on where you happen to be in town. Again, you’ need to ask the wait staff what they recommend that does not have sweetened sauces and could you please have more veggies instead of rice.

6. In a hurry during the week?

• Grab Amber’s various packages from www.feedmeak.com. She uses whole foods and is an amazing chef working out of a commercial kitchen.
• Some of her dishes do have dairy, added sugars, and cereal grains… most are amazing. Talk with her about your preferences; she aims to please.
• Use the code Synergy10 to get 10% off.
• Individual meals are delivered frozen so you can store and reheat.

7. Exaggerate your reason—This is only an emergency tactic!

A true friend will honor your personal goals. It takes a sense of humor and a little bit of courage—make your point with a non-judgmental smile on your face—including:

1. training for a marathon or getting up early for a big day hiking and want your game in;
2. don’t want a Lyme flare-up;
3. dairy makes my back hurt or stirs up my eczema…
4. cane, corn, and agave, sugar and I’ll be on the toilet all day tomorrow;
5. Another example is, recently, I spent some time with a dear friend who didn’t want to partake in drinking. When he was offered wine, he simply answered “No thanks, it’s been so long since I’ve had any and I don’t know what it would do to me”. Fact is, alcoholism was a problem in his family (which only I knew). I served him lemon in water and we got on to telling stories. Very fun stories!
6. Understand your friends. Someone who actually cares about you and wants the best for you won’t continue to pressure you into doing things that are bad for your health. They will understand if you talk to them.

Eating out can be very enjoyable. Stop worrying about what other people think; become more comfortable with yourself. It takes time and courage to develop consistent healthy habits. You can do it.

Also, take it easy on yourself. You don’t have to be a perfectionist all the time! I do really love fried calamari and have not yet figured out how to make it without beer batter (grains and wheat). If anyone has a great grain-free recipe, please post in the comments below.

Hugs!

Marie